I was lying in bed last night, thinking about what will happen if this goes as well as I hope, and my IP's get pregnant. I thought about how I could go about finding another couple, and realised that it really is a MAMMOTH task and I have been so lucky with my current IPs that everything just feel into our lap. Destined to be eh - oh, and while I remember, I wanted to quickly tell you what happened when I had my bloods taken.. Hubby and I see 1's freakishly often, but at appropriate times (when we are thinking of someone, or struggling to make a decision) Well, when I had my bloods taken for this cycle I had to sign the forms, and I asked the nurse the date, as she said '10.01.11' I smiled and it gave me warm fuzzies as I wrote it down, but would you believe as she put the needle in and I looked away I happen to glance at the digital clock, 11.11 - would you believe it. I found this: "Whenever you see the sequence 111 or 1111 show up, it is a great sign of a golden opportunity. Both sequences mean that a "doorway" has opened up in which your intentions and goals will manifest extremely quickly"
So anyway, back to the topic - obviously one of the massive hurdles you face as a donor is finding a recipient. All of the donor sites forbid you for advertising yourself as a donor, they say it could mean that a lot of potential IP's get let down, and it would just resemble a meat market. Now while I understand this, I also feel as if the role of the donor should be made as simple and straight forward as possible.
The search for IPs is a long and arduous task - Firstly I have to trawl through adds. Possibly a crapload. If I see an add that sounds suitable, the first thing I have to do is email them and ask them questions, and try and gauge if we are on the same page. If not, how do you possibly say "oh, thanks anyway, not the sort of person I am looking for..." without having got their hopes up? and even worse, what if the IP doesnt like YOU!? What about the potential of donors getting let down? "Gosh Im sorry, yes I really want a donor egg, just not your donor egg, but thanks anyway" Imagine losing a potential donor candidate, purely because of a few picky IPs... What a huge loss for those who would have loved those eggs.
There seems to be a common presumption that donors have plenty of time on their hands, they have hours to read about IPs and hours to get to know if they would be a good match. In all seriousness, what is wrong with advertising yourself? If an add were to say:
Im looking for a couple, that feel 'this' way about egg donation, that would like 'this' amount of contact with the donor after a baby is born, that have 'these' beliefs - And then give a good description of oneself, along with CLEARLY specifying that only one or two suitable IPs will be replied to, how is that possibly any more of a letdown than placing a 'donor wanted' add, and not hearing from anyone. And how is that possibly not so much more productive, knowing that you will automatically be cancelling out the people that dont fit your beliefs and more importantly, the ones that really dont want your eggs!?! Yes, I can imagine you would get lots of emails, and possibly lots of phonies, but I trust my instincts, and I trust that I will be drawn to the right person getting in touch with the questions you want answered, as I have been drawn to my current IPs.
I was a member of another fertility forum, and when I went to visit today I had been deleted, purely because I dont spend my life on there. I emailed them to ask if they could reinstate my membership - 'oh, just re-apply' I was told. Theres that presumption again, of course I have time to fill out the membership forms again, and explain why I want to be on the forum! What on earth else could I possibly have to be doing today?
What a rant eh. Poor hubby has copped it all day today, it seems this pill makes me quite moody. Gosh I hope my IPs dont thing Im Eggzilla. No need to worry about my well being guys, I think its my man you all need to look out for! Youll soon learn Im one to voice my opinions, especially when Im moody - I apologise to the places I phoned and moaned to today - actually no, Fisher and Paykel can kiss my bum cheeks - I may be moody, but it seems with my mood comes productivity. And that, well, I can always benefit from a little more of ;)
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